Category Archives: Humor

Letting Go in 2025, Week Fifty-Two in the No Longer New Abnormal

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I don’t know what 2025 has in store for us, but I do know that I am doing my best to let things go so I have the mental space to enjoy what good comes our way, and to endure what hardships might present themselves.  I think of letting go as a lifestyle edit.  However, I don’t have a great track record of editing my own stuff.  I give things away and quickly fill the void.  I attempt to open up time in my schedule only to return to my busy norm.  I believe in second and seventeenth chances, so I am cleaning out my drawers and closets, as best I can. I am limiting my activity to events that bring me pure joy.  Letting go is more a state of being than the action it takes to unload.  

In the service of letting go, I will be shifting when and how I post on this blog.  It may not be weekly, unless I’m so inclined.  I am going to try to create a bit of freedom from writing so that I can relax more.  It will be interesting to see what that’s like.  I’ve learned so much from these past years writing this blog.  The comments you sent lifted me up or had me look at blind spots.  I saw glorious New York City differently as I tried to share passing sights along the way. 

I am beyond grateful for those of you who have been readers.  It is my hope that writing this blog contributed in some way to whatever you’ve been going through.  I wish each of you moments of joy and grace throughout 2025 as you navigate a reality we dared not imagine.  

Self-Care Tips:

  • Make a list of self-care tips from past blog posts or from other sources.  Make sure they’re tips you can easily do and that you find helpful.  The list is a great resource when you’re stressed or feeling down and can’t think of what may be useful.  
  • Go through your sock drawer to rid yourself of socks with holes. But if you prefer, darn them.   It’s a little thing you can do to start the new year without past defects that are easily remedied.  
  • Enjoy the last vestiges of the holiday season by reliving the splendid Darlene Love when she performed her holiday classic on the last David Letterman Holiday Special.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tsU08y9peZg

Soup’s On, Week Fifty-One in the No Longer New Abnormal

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It’s soup season.  A pot of lentil soup is simmering on the stove.  I plan to enjoy any number of soups throughout winter.  This batch of lentil soup is flavored with Moroccan spices. When I’m not able to get away it’s fun to tour the planet from my kitchen.  I’ll create an Italian tomato basil soup next week, and then a Thai chicken soup after that.  As a child soup was limited to Campbell’s, and later Progresso.  I liked them well enough, but the first time I had real Greek chicken and lemon soup, I knew the canned options were relegated to my past.  

Soup is also a wonderful metaphor for the fullness of our lives.  How much spice do we enjoy?  What is the base of your life’s soup?  I like variety so I tend to have a few pots on the stove.  I enjoy bold flavors, but once in a while I prefer a simple broth.  On those occasions, staying home or getting away to a quieter environment makes all the difference.  This week the soup was full of holiday cheer.  Norm Lewis is performing a holiday concert, which he deems a party, at 54 Below.  He knows how to bring true joy to every stage where he performs.  And the New York Pops just had their holiday concert at Carnegie Hall with Jessica Vosk, an amazing performer I only discovered this week.  I will be catching up on her unparalleled talent by listening to her albums while cooking my soups.  

This holiday season can easily bring many feelings some delightful, like when enjoying a concert of top talent. Or it can feel lonely, like when you are missing those we’ve lost to illness or circumstances beyond your control.  Think about what you need.  What do you put in your soup?  If you’re up for it, there may be volunteer opportunities that can be deeply gratifying.  Or gift yourself something from your closet.  Find a sweater you forgot you had.  Or, open up a jar of spice you rarely use for your own special soup.  Be thoughtful about what you need these next couple of weeks.  Comfort and joy can take many forms.  In the same way that soup is an ever-changing course.  

Self-Care Tips:

  • Make soup.  Or enjoy soups that others make.  Warm yourself in this cold weather. 
  • In really cold weather, putting on a pair of latex medical gloves as liners below your gloves will keep your fingers extra toasty.  
  • Discover Jessica Vosk for yourself.  If you already knew of her, then revisit her dynamic talent.  Enjoy her holiday album.  Here’s a video to enjoy a taste:  https://www.instagram.com/p/DDz1GjbpUcg/

‘Tis the Season, Week Forty-Nine in the No Longer New Abnormal

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It’s easy to hunker down now that the cold weather is here.  And there’s something to be said for hibernation mode.  But this week I was out and about taking in the holiday spirit, which is alive and well in New York City.  I love a good nap when the weather is chilly and the days are short.  And, yet, visiting Rockefeller Center and the holiday window displays later in the evening, when they’re less crowded is a joyful experience that really does bring cheer.  Sometimes we have to be intentional about seeking out positive experiences.  Yes, sometimes they come to us.  But mostly we need to create joy.  

In this season, it’s easy to look for and enjoy delightful experiences.  Maybe we listen to holiday songs.  Certainly, Mariah Carey gets her due in early winter.  Though one can’t deny her talent, I’m more inclined to listen to Samara Joy for a jazz-infused holiday listen.  Others I enjoy are Norm Lewis, Liz Calloway and her sister, Ann Hampton Calloway, and Megan Hilty.  Plus the Maccabeats and Klezmtics have wonderful Hannukah tunes.  Of course, YouTube is perfect for contemporary or historical holiday fare.  It’s nice to get a slice of joy just by watching Nat King Cole, or Peter, Paul and Mary.  

Of course, music and lights aren’t the only pleasures of this season.  The scents and flavors of the holidays bring their own pleasures.  Whether you light a candle with hints of nutmeg, or you enjoy latkes with apple sauce, there is so much joy we can create these cold weather days.  

Self-Care Tips:  

  • Enjoy something specific to this season that you enjoy whether it’s food, a drink like egg nog or coquito, a scent, a show like the Holiday Spectacular at Rockefeller Center with the Rockettes, or a drive to see the neighborhood lights, you can take in something that focuses on joy.
  • Rediscover something you love in your home.  We can take for granted what we already have.  But look up and revel in artwork on your walls again.  Or go to your closet and wear something that feels great. Find a frozen dish in your freezer that you forgot about but can enjoy this week.  It’s so much fun to appreciate we already have.  
  • Whatever your age, care for your inner child.  Be gentle if she/he/they need compassion.  Raise the volume if you yearn to play.  

Best Non-Fiction of 2024, Week Fourty-Six in the No Longer New Abnormal

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I was reading through my emails when I received a thoughtful text from a very kind person who sent me a picture of my book on the table of the Best Non-Fiction of 2024.  This was at the Barnes & Noble on the Upper Eastside of Manhattan.  How considerate it was to send me that picture.  And, how thrilled I was seeing my book in the photo.  It’s been challenging playing the promotion game, and I am not great at promoting my own interests.  Yes, I think the book would be helpful especially at this time.  I think it’s important to find the self-care tips during hardships whenever and wherever they show up.  And, thinking of what got us through past difficulties allows us to remember that we will get through this, too.  Those were a couple of reasons I wrote In the Time of Coronavirus.   I was so pleased when good reviews started to come in from those I didn’t know.  And, grateful for the couple of reviews from those who do know me, and still liked the book. 

It’s been easy these past weeks to focus on negative news.  And there’s plenty of it.  So I will take the joy where I find it.  Today it was looking at the text, and appreciating the kindness it took in sending it to me. It made my day.  And, though I am not comfortable doing promotions, I am challenging myself by sharing the picture here.  

Self-Care Tips:

  • Brag a little.  Sometimes we need to advocate for ourselves by tooting our own horn.  I highly suggest this for shy or self-critical individuals.  It has meaning to state an accomplishment.  
  • Find what is funny.  We need laughter now more than ever.  I welcome suggestions.  I suggest Abbott Elementary, New Yorker cartoons, Wanda Sykes latest Netflix special. 
  • Practice active listening.  Rather than bring up a related topic based on a personal thought or experience, learn from what the other person is saying.  Listen for new information.  

Change is Inevitable, Week Forty-Four in the No Longer New Abnormal

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If change is the only constant in life, why do we have such a hard time with it?  When two old friends died this past week I was grateful to have known them. Although my life will not change much since they were no longer regular presences in my current life, their kindness, compassion and humor have stayed with me since we met in the 80’s.  However, their close family and friends now will feel the change in their lives profoundly, as do we all when death comes to those we love.  

On another note, over 50,000 people are running in the New York City marathon today.  For many this is their first marathon and if they’re able to cross the finish line they will be marathoners.  That will change how they know themselves today and going forward.   If, they are unable to cross because of injury or for other reasons, their expectations will probably feel like a loss, and they will feel changed in ways very different from their fellow runners.    

Even the mundane changes of everyday life have an impact.  Our vacuum cleaner broke.  How and why remain a mystery. But finding one that will hold up to our needs, while staying within a budget, then learning how to use it properly, take away from much needed rest this weekend.  While I can derive a sense of mild accomplishment by using the new vacuum, I prefer not to have to deal with the regular failings of products and services.  

And as a nation, we are facing a huge change.  We’re about to have a new president.  That is a change that will make a lot happy and others scared, sad or angry.  What will it mean?  How do we handle it?  Change in our lives won’t end.  Some changes are welcome, while others upset us, or at worst, hurt us.  My hope is that we learn and grow from change. Let’s rise to the challenge to be our better selves.  

Self-Care Tips:

  • When faced with a disappointing change, acknowledge the upset, and when the time is right, see what is needed to accommodate the change.  Balance caring for yourself and taking steps to live with the new circumstances. 
  • Purposely take one action that will create a change you want.  Open a savings account and deposit a small amount for an intended goal.  Or run one block to start a new habit.  One small step can make a big difference.  
  • Find the humor.  Bringing levity to stressful times is imperative for anxious times.  

Marilyn Maye, Week Forty-One in the No Longer New Abnormal

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Marilyn Maye is a legend.   Perhaps you haven’t heard of her?  She is a 92-year-old cabaret singer who gives her audiences stylized singing and beautiful arrangements of standards.  I had been meaning to see her for years and it finally happened this past week. A dear friend and I came to see her at 54 Below, the storied cabaret underneath the Studio 54 Theater.  Marilyn’s first album came out in 1965.  She appeared on The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson more than any other singer, 76 times.  I could go on, but you can easily look her up.  

She is a pro.  Her warmth and generosity are palpable.  She loves her audiences, and we love her back.  It was inspiring to see her perform.  Not only is she a consummate pro, but she makes it seem easy to share her love of the music while standing for her entire set.  The couple with whom we were sharing our table have seen her show over thirty times.  This is not unusual with her audiences.  Prior to the show we watched a community of fans greet each other as if they were reunited for another family event. 

What inspired me most when watching a master at work, was that Marilyn Maye was doing what she loves on her own terms.  Few of us have her longevity, let alone the stamina to constantly work on our craft and then dazzle others.  She has what it takes, and she shares it freely.  Going to her show has given me the vivacity to keep going.  I may or may not realize my future dreams, but Marilyn Maye inspired me to do all I can to continually pursue them.  She has a gift and she keeps on giving. 

Self-Care Tips:  

  • Learn from those older than you.  So many have wisdom that they are happy to share.  It might just inspire you.  
  • Bring alacrity to your craft.  When you add a positive energy to what you’re doing it’s uplifting for you and others. 
  • Don’t forget to sing.  It’s a mod changer.  

Fourth Quarter, Week Forty in the No Longer new Abnormal

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We are entering the last quarter of 2024.  I feel like I’m rushing to accomplish what I had intended this year.  Some things take longer than others.  I had hoped I would have been able to promote my book more, but I had so much to learn.  And some of the promotion is not for me.  Given it isn’t what I had imagined, it’s important that I am grateful for what I could do.  I am grateful for all those who supported me and the book.  And, I am grateful for the lessons I’ve learned thus far, like the fact that I prefer smaller discussions to larger presentations.  And that I don’t enjoy marketing, nor have I ever enjoyed it.  Sharing something freely and needing to sell something are very different.  

I was in sales for a number of years in my teens and early twenties.  I started by working the cash register at my father’s shoe store.  I learned quickly that the description of a job and the job itself weren’t one in the same.  Being a cashier also meant vacuuming, stocking shoes, running lunch orders, and doing inventory.  I stayed in sales at local department stores, and when I came to New York City in 1981, I worked at Bloomingdales.  It was a glamorous store where I got to see many celebrities, imaging that this tentative connection had deep meaning for my hopes to be an actress.  I did love being there, though I was not so fond of the low pay.  But being in Manhattan and close to the theater district were enthralling.  It didn’t feel like sales, but more like sharing new discoveries.  

In the 80s, Bloomingdales was a hub of activity.  Andy Warhol walking through the store with his entourage was a regular occurrence.  Meeting Liza Minelli who was shopping with her sister, Lorna Luft, was not.  Waiting on Donald Sutherland was another highlight, finding his gentle demeanor as disarming in person as on the big screen.  I also loved the special international features and displays throughout the store that promoted fashion, art, films, food, and history from whatever country was being showcased.  So when I was passing through Bloomingdales yesterday it was nice to see that they were experiencing a renaissance.  Italy was having its moment at the flagship store.  I waxed nostalgic remembering the energy of those earlier years.  Glad to see the store, at least for this moment, has gone back to its roots.  

Now while I look back on the many fortunate experiences I’ve enjoyed, I will go into the last quarter of this year to create new memories.  I’ll enjoy seeing actors on stage exercising their craft rather than shopping on their time off.  I will slowly promote my book on my terms.  And, I will appreciate working as a psychotherapist with amazing individuals, rather than as a salesperson seeing others for brief encounters.  

Self-Care Tips:  

  • Review what you’ve accomplished or learned so far this year, while thinking of what you may plan for the next three months.  
  • Slow down when possible.  It allows us to enjoy the moment even while moving forward.  
  • Remember that joy comes from feeling your feelings no matter how hard that can be.  Joy is not denying hard feelings and topping them with forced happiness.  

Traveling, Week Thirty-Two in the No Longer New Abnormal

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This weekend I walked in the steaming heat enjoying Summer Streets while traversing Park Avenue without cars.  I will miss the next two Saturdays, so it was a pleasant reprieve to have more than enough room while walking among pedestrians, runners, and cyclists.  I am going away.  Initially I packed for a hot summer, but according to the lower temperatures in Dublin I was ill prepared.  Following my lovely and tiring walk, I  unpacked and repacked for a ten-day trip to Ireland.  Instead of tank tops and sandals I’m bringing sweaters and socks.  

I am very excited.  Reading Edna O’Brian and Roddy Doyle, starting in high school, have instilled in me a love of Ireland, though I’ve never step foot on the Island.  It was my college friend, Shawn Wilson’s idea.  We had been trying to get together for years.  We both have busy professional lives with very different schedules.  Shawn threw out the idea and the trip was planned within a day.  Not only did we agree on the one week that was good for both of us, but she found an amazing local tour that appealed to both of us.  Since I am usually the planner in my family, it was an extra luxury to have my friend take care of the details.  

We’ll meet up in Dublin and go from there, probably taking too many pictures.  In the meantime, I have a few off-the-beaten-path pictures of New York City, pre-vacation.  

Self-Care Tips:  

  • Hugs.  If you know a good hugger exchange a great hug.  If you are on your own, wrap your arms around yourself for a self-loving embrace.  
  • Seek out something unusual for you.  Read an article from another point of view.  Look up an unfamiliar country and find out about its culture, foods, landscape and customs.
  • Enjoy in-season fruits and vegetables.  The peaches are divine.  The strawberries and blueberries are at their peak.  And summer squash is sweet and versatile.  

Broken Phone, Week Twenty-Five in the No Longer New Abnormal

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I was surprised today when I dropped my iPhone and the case cracked that it didn’t create a tailspin in which I cracked a bit, too.  Instead, I was thankful that I gave myself a day with a flexible schedule allowing me to take Lucy and me to the Apple store to have my phone repaired.  I even sat patiently waiting for my turn as Lucy demanded treats since it wasn’t her idea to leave our neighborhood.  Luckily I unknowingly stocked enough treats for the day.  

I can get a bit unhinged when things don’t go my way.  When I plan for an easy day it usually does not include hours in pursuit of a phone repair.  Somehow I wasn’t miffed.  I did what I needed to do. Though they were unable to fix my phone today, they will have the part next week.  And, Larry, who works at Apple, can take my phone in, leaving me phoneless for a day next weekend.  But it’s not a day with a phone session, so I think I’ll be okay.  

I am grateful for whatever was in play that allowed for a calm day despite the change in plans.  I espouse going with the flow, but I am not always the poster girl for that sentiment.  Somehow today was different.  Maybe it had to do that I wasn’t under a tight schedule.  Often self-enforces I try to get a lot done in any given day.  Maybe today will help me to take it easy more.  I have to say it certainly is more pleasant than adding pressure to accomplish more and more.  In having less to do, I was able to take care of what was most important.  Lucy got a long walk in, and I got to make sure my phone will be fixed.  

All in all a good day, cracked phone included.  

Self-Care Tips:  

  • Try to lighten up your schedule to make room for the unexpected
  • Make a note when you have a different reaction to an unwanted situation.  If you are more upset, check in with yourself to see if it’s added to existing stressors.  And if it’s less than maddening, appreciate the moment and enjoy the emotional freedom when it presents itself.  
  • Rather than judging yourself when you judge another, see if you can detach from the thought allowing that it’s a thought not an indictment of your character.  When we judge ourselves for judging others we only add to our judgements.  When we release the thought, we lessen what we deem unbecoming. Thus we are kinder to ourselves leading the way to have more compassion for others.  

Publishing Week, Week Twenty-Three in the No Longer New Abnormal

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This Tuesday I become a published author with In the Time of Coronavirus, Reflecting on the Past to Embrace a Joyful Future.  To that end I am doing everything I know to do to promote this book, working to get it into stores, sites and libraries and into readers’ hands.  It is a daunting task.  I am overwhelmed, yet very excited.  

I am grateful to all of you who pre-ordered the book.  Not only does your support mean the world to me, but it also provides a small foothold into the publishing world.  Any reviews to Goodreads, Amazon, Barnes and Noble or other review outlets would be greatly appreciated.  I am not comfortable asking for your support, and yet, I am willing to step out of my comfort zone to say please and thank you.  

I am hopeful that the book will provide some support for its readers.  Given today and days ahead with much to accomplish, I am writing a short blog.  Wishing you a lovely weekend, and again, thank you.  

Self-Care Tips:

  • Take one small step towards a goal you desire.  We often think we have to accomplish so much, but each small step moves us closer to our goals.  Put one dollar away towards a major purchase.  Clean one small surface even if you have an entire home to clean, etc. 
  • Contact someone from your past to let them know what a difference they made in your life.  We often don’t let people know and then regret not saying something when it’s too late.  
  • Make a mental note or write it down if you like of at least one thing off the top of your head for which you’re grateful.  As for me, I am so grateful you’re reading this.